BUT I FEEL LIKE A FOOL !
by unrestrainedjane
This is one of my biggest healing stumbling blocks.
I hear this often from so many survivors of antisocial personality disorder. i think we have all felt this way at some point in our recovery. dont feel like a fool these guys are
( can be a woman too) pathological liars and very believable in the beginning. they get away with it usually by being so charming to everyone around you except who they are close to like their partner. and we dont usually know something is wrong until after the love bombing stops and they start to let their mask slip off. do not feel like a fool , they are the fool.
unrestrained jane 
I don’t feel like a fool. I feel like I was gang raped. I am terrified of what might happen to me for speaking out. I know I cannot heal without telling my story.
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Well, post-funeral/memorial I feel *much* less like I was ever a fool, and a lot more like you describe. Except, I now have the unique advantage of not being afraid of him anymore, given that he died. It’s all still…. I’m just still in shock. Processing. It’s really not something I was prepared for.
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